Simplicity and Complexity

Most people want simple things. Cheese sticks. A cup of coffee in the morning. Cotton candy. A clean pair of underwear. A warm bed. What brings people happiness are usually so ordinary, that most people do not know why these things make them happy. It just does.

If you look at it one way, most people crave for simplicity in their relationships. They want this template to happen: Girl meets boy. They fall in love. They marry and have kids and maybe have a dog or two. They grow old together and die in each other’s arms. The end.  Most people would kill to have something like this in their lives. Everyone wants to be John and Marsha. The sweetest love stories could be encapsulated in grandma and grandpa growing old together.

However, life is the ultimate comedian. Most relationships don’t follow that template at all. Relationships follow meandering paths. Relationships have drama. Relationships have conflict. We shatter our relationships with other people and repair it haphazardly, forming barely recognizable things. Love hurts and it hurts bad.

I must contend however that these are what make relationships capture our imagination. Look at the great love stories. Helen and Paris. Romeo and Juliet. Sherlock and Dr. Watson. These stories are not simple things at all. The conflict and drama in these relationships are what make them compelling to us.

I read one true story about a Katipunero who went to war with the Spaniards because the father of the love of his life called him a coward. To prove his bravery, he joined the Katipunan and in one battle, he was fatally wounded. Before he died though, his paramour saw him one last time and called him the bravest man she ever met. He died in her arms. Heavy.

It’s stories like these the prove a fundamental truth: Love hurts but it is the human capacity to endure this pain and suffering that makes love stories great. The greatest love stories, the epics, the legends would not be so if they did not have a great conflict within them. So if you are in a broken relationship, if you feel that loving hurts too much, fret not. Your story might just be legendary. However, if you have a simple love story and you are content, hold onto it. You have something that is envied the world over. The whole point here is that love, whether it be the sweet simplicity or raging complexity, is beautiful no matter what form it takes.

anghulinghugutero