So my birthday just ended. To be fair, it was an awesome birthday. I got a new PS4 and Leni won the official tally. I went to the gym and then stuffed my face with food (good food too). Plus it rained and I love the rain (there was a time that I didn’t but I got over that now). That ladies and gentlemen, is a day well spent even though it’s not what I wanted. The intravert inside of me just wants to get away. I actually wanted to spend my birthday alone somewhere, just me and my laptop (yes, I have a laptop now) typing away at silly stories about rabbits (more on that later) or writing a burger review. I didn’t get that imagined day, but as Mick Jagger says, you don’t always get what you want.
The thing is, I’ve always hated birthdays, my own specifically. I don’t really know why, but I get really irritated on my birthday. If I was Sigmund Freud, I would say it would because of a repressed desire to have my own way during my birthday and I never quite have it my way. Those little things that you want on your birthday just niggle on you and are more irritating than a total disaster of a day. It’s kinda selfish I know, but this the one time of the year that I want to be selfish. The rest of the year I’m a ball of sunshine (with a severely depressed inner core).
Then I depressed myself even more when I looked into SHE WHO MUST NOT BE NAMED’S Instagram account (I should stop doing this) and found out that she got back together with her boyfriend, the same boyfriend who left her eleven months and sixteen days ago. The exact same boyfriend who broke up with her and left her crying on the shoulder of the least emotionally stable person in the world – me.
Don’t get me wrong. I know that I have no right to be jealous. I know that I have no right to be angry. I have no right to be this way.
But yeah, it still hurts. It’s the folly of falling in love and not being loved in return. It is the folly of caring too much. It is the folly of being human.
And that ladies and gentlemen, is my birthday hugot.
If you need me, I’ll be here drinking some Stella.
Ang Huling Hugotero